Rejection - the teen years


Image being asked to leave home just because you a have a new baby step-brother? Worse than that, your mother is a slave to your step-mother and has no choice in the matter! The clincher; your father loves you dearly and doesn't want you to go but has no choice but to ask you to leave.

The scenario described above is recorded in Genesis 21 which covers the period from the birth of Isaac (baby step-brother) until he was weaned. Abraham (father) held a feast to celebrate this milestone but during the feast Sarah (step-mother) sees her 16 year-old step-son Ishmael teasing her son. This was too much for her, and she demanded that Abraham "cast out this bondwoman and her son; for the son of this bondwoman shall not be heir with my son, namely with Isaac." (v10).  For more than sixteen years Hagar (mother) had served Sarah as a bondwoman (servant). The problem was that Hagar also had borne a child to Abraham (with Sarah's agreement) and Hagar's son Ishmael had become precious to Abraham while Sarah remained childless. In due course Isaac was born to Abraham and Sarah and he was cherished after years of hoping for a child. Ishmael's thoughtless teenage behavior at the celebration  would have been totally lost on Isaac but to Sarah, an especially protective mother, this teasing was unacceptable and she "let rip". Sarah's demand made Abraham very unhappy as he loved his son Ishmael but God intervened and let Abraham know this separation was intended and he was to send Hagar and Ishmael away. 

Parting is such sorrow

Hagar and Ishmael by George Hitchcock
The next day Abraham sent them off with provisions and the departure would have deeply affected Ishmael. A million questions must have run through Ishmael's mind; "what did I do wrong?", "why do we have to leave?","will I see my father again?" and the sense of rejection would have been especially strong. Unfortunately, it didn't take Hagar long to get lost in the arid lands south of Beersheba and they ran out of water. In her dehydrated state Hagar sunk into despair and began to believe Ishmael would die, placed him under a shrub and sat down weep. Genesis records the following:

15 And the water in the skin was used up, and she placed the boy under one of the shrubs. 
16 Then she went and sat down across from him at a distance of about a bow-shot; for she said to herself, "Let me not see the death of the boy." So she sat opposite him, and lifted her voice and wept. 
17 And God heard the voice of the lad. Then the angel of God called to Hagar out of heaven, and said to her, "What ails you, Hagar? Fear not, for God has heard the voice of the lad where he is. 
18 Arise, lift up the lad and hold him with your hand, for I will make him a great nation." 
19 Then God opened her eyes, and she saw a well of water. And she went and filled the skin with water, and gave the lad a drink. 
20 So God was with the lad; and he grew and dwelt in the wilderness, and became an archer. 

Lost and hearing voices

As in Genesis 16, God intervened and called out to Hagar with a surprising question "What ails you, Hagar?" Again, like Genesis 16, it seems a superfluous question but God was speaking to the heart of the issue like He had earlier. There, God had spoken promise after promise about the future of her son. Here, the Lord appears to be gently chiding her and saying "I told you I would never leave you nor forsake you". What is surprising is that God actually responded to the voice of Ishmael and not Hagar's weeping (v17). Sixteen years of living with Abraham would have meant that Ishmael would have seen many supernatural things and how God spoke to Abraham. Also, both Hagar and Abraham would have encouraged Ishmael with the promises God had spoken over his life and in this desperate moment Ishmael prayed to the God of Abraham for help.

Hold him tightly

God heard Ishmael's prayer and tells Hagar to "fear not as God has heard the voice of the lad where he is" (v17).  He reiterated His promises about Ishmael's future and how he would become a great nation. He then tells Hagar to "lift up the lad and hold him with your hand" (v18). Many commentators miss the implications of this section and give the impression he was weak little boy and he needed help to get up but there is more to the command than that. The Hebrew word used here for the word 'hold' is an empowering word meaning "be strong: figuratively, courageous, causatively strengthen, cure, help, repair, fortify" (see Strongs #2388). God was saying, as He had in Genesis 16: 12, that her son would be a wild man and you will need to keep a strong grip on him (see Ellicott's Commentary for English Readers for more on this). 

A name, a promise and a new father

Also, there is much more in the three words "where he is" at the end of verse 17. This teenager was at rock bottom - very thirsty, frightened and emotionally hurt and, for the first time in his life, he was confronting a situation beyond his control and strength. In his weakened state God responds to Ishmael's cry for help just 'where he was'. He didn't have earn God's attention because God already knew of his suffering and He had a plan for this young man. At that moment Ishmael experienced the powerful love of Abraham's God and He saved  them when He showed Hagar the well of water not far away. 

Finally, verse 20 succinctly describes God's closeness to Ishmael with the wonderful words:  "so God was with the lad". God had named him (Genesis 16:11) , promised he would become a leader (Genesis 21:18) and God would care for him!  




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